Friday, April 27, 2012

My Friends' Future

Do you want to know a secret?
I know some of the most amazing people on this planet. No really, I'm convinced that within my small town and in my even smaller group of friends, reside some of the most spectacular people you will ever meet. I'm not just saying this because I'm close with these people--I can spot an idiot from a mile away. The creativity, passions, senses of humor, and love that I have encountered actually made make not  so terrified that my generation, mired in Juggalos and Bros, will soon be running the country.
And I'm thoroughly convinced that some of the people were placed in my life in order for me to come to a self-actualization on how far behind I really can be. I'm talking about the people that, before the age of 18, have published two plays, traveled the world, received straight A's and still managed to find time to donate blood to orphaned  cats every Tuesday. The ones who have their own business cards and autobiography. You know who I'm talking about, those people you know you're going to end up being a gardener for.
Okay...maybe a cook. And as much as these people intimidate me, they also continue to empower me.
One of these people once said "I just want to be a successful and useful person, I owe it to everyone who has brought me here in my life."
And it's true, not to sound like a 99 cent greeting card, but not only do we owe it to ourselves to lead great lives, but to anyone who has ever invested an ounce of energy into our future.
So while I may not be the type to willingly give my blood to a pet in need (which was made apparent earlier this week when a tiny needle was pressed into my vein by a Ukranian nurse, and I almost fainted) I should still be pushing  myself to my full potential,  I owe it  more than to just myself. What scares me the most is the fact that I may try my best at something and it just wont be good enough.
This is why I think these certain people have been placed in my life. I see their passions, goals and accomplishments and admittedly it makes me want a piece of it for myself. I know future Wall Street lawyers, comedians, musicians, directors, engineers, and doctors. Some don't know it yet. But it makes me extremely excited when I see a person living the life they're meant to lead. So many are destined for success and I know they'll get it.
They make me realize I should be giving everything I have in order to get everything I want. If I someday want to write for a television series maybe I should be blogging more, in order to refine my writing skills and also to please my number one fan. (You know who you are, and while I appreciate the attention, the letters written in your own blood have become too many. I'm concerned there's only so much AB+a body can hold). I'm constantly inspired by the people I talk to, or the jokes I hear in passing period. It's the people we see everyday that allow us to see their talents, and turn our inspiration into passion. I mean sometimes I feel like I'm just getting by (clearly) until the next day comes. And others, I see someone who is really making an impact on the lives of themselves and others, and I'm excited to see what the next day will teach me.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Wild for Wilde Part 2: More Then Friends

"Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love but no friendship." ~Oscar Wilde

As I've ventured through numerous relationships with the opposite sex, I've come to find the above statement hauntingly true. It seems that in friendships between woman and man there' s going to be that burning chemistry that neither of you can ignore, or the exctiting loathing over a broken heart, and 9 times out 10 someone is going to want to more then the other.
But Oscar, I'm sorry to say that there are exceptions to this rule. I think it is possible for two people to be close without a firey attraction between the two of them. I've only had a few types of relationships like this with a guy, and let me tell you that they're pretty amazing. It's nice to get insight into the mysterious world of the opposite sex without worrying about how I look or if I accidentally let out a hideous snort instead of produce a cute, feminine giggle. Someone who you can be totally yourself with yet neither of you has the desire to date. The conversations I've had with these boys have been some of the most fun, funniest and dumbest of my life. They've ranged from Alien abductions to Kim Kardashian (bless all of those who were in earshot) but they also give me insight into the world of masculinity, without the lingering questions and heart break. These types of friendships, sadly, are exceedingly rare and usually work best if one of the people is an a committed relationship.
So I don't think the main question between man and woman is "Can we be more then friends?" it's "Can we be friends at all?"
I don't know about you, but I've come to find that with an innocent realtionship with the opposite gender can quickly turn into a flirty one.
But maybe this is how men and women were supposed to function--can we really help that we're just so attracted to eachother? Nah.
 This type of attraction really is what binds man and woman together. I'm fascinated with the idea that I can get on a bus, make eye contact with an attractive man, and get off deeply infatuated. (Nevermind he probably was using public transportation due to a DUI and license suspension. Attraction knows no bounds.)
Men and women could easily be buddies if we didn't fall in love with eachother so quickly. And in high school, hormones racing left and right, this kind of obsession isn't exactly a one of a kind commodity. So as much as I love my rare, genuine friendships with a man, I like the possibility of finding someone special just as much.
Well what if a true guy-girl friendship without lust is harder to find then Wilson the volleyball? I believe many of us find desire just that much more interesting. And we're all just getting by until the person we want the most sees us as more then just a pal.

Image: IMDb for the movie Just Friends

Sunday, April 8, 2012

How To Hold On To Your Dignity

The confirmation that we aren' t total failures at life. The feeling we get when we know we've made ourselves look good, humble, and maybe even a little cool. By definition, it is the state or quality of being worthy of honor or respect. This my friends, is called dignity. It makes us feel strong and powerful, like we've got this omnipresent glow of impermeable self-satisfaction. I guess that's why it hurts just that much more when it gets taken away. Now, I'm an expert at both getting dignity taken away from me and seeing it getting stripped off of others. So below I've compiled a list to help all of you dignity-enthusiasts sustain that respect and honor you truly deserve.

1. Never text and run on a treadmill-it will end in tears and the taunting of small children.

2. If you put your phone on mute there is a reason it is on mute, make sure the person on the other end really can't hear you.

3. Don't Facebook stalk your ex's new boyfriend or girlfriend. Or if you must, be sure you're alone and you speak of it to nobody.

4. If you're a grown man, don't go around dressing, or talking like The Fonz.

5. Know when it's time for the curtain to fall, timing is everything.

6. Don't do the whole "Oops, I accidentally texted the wrong person even though it was actually the right person I just didn't want to appear needy" thing. We've all done it, so we can all see through it.

7. Eating spinach on a first date is sort of an "Enter at Your Own Risk" thing.

8. Making That's What She Said jokes while someone is giving a eulogy is usually frowned upon.

9. If you enjoy Waterslides make sure your bathing suit is securely fastened...thank me later.

10. If you're feeling sick to your stomach don't accept a ride home in your friend's dad's clean, and prized truck, trust me.

11. If you look like a latex glove you've had too much plastic surgery.

12. Never pluck your eyebrows using a magnetized mirror. You will look like Mr. Clean.
I know I did.

13. If you trip in public blame it on the current Lunar pattern and keep going.

14. Always get your belts replaced on your car. If you've ever had this problem, you know why.

15. If any dignity is lost, all you can do is just get by. I know I have. And always keep in mind these moments make for great stories later.